AI services like ChatGPT and Grok have been dominating the internet and transforming the way people do almost everything online, and now they’ve had their say on the cannabis industry.
One trend that has circled the net is asking the chatbots to give their take on a certain topic, incident, event or era in time and spit out an interesting analysis. You can even ask it to deliver it in the style of a person or with a specific vibe. In this case, AI was asked to roast – a form of comedy that rips a few home truths in a comical way.
For those who have been involved with the birth and evolution of the cannabis industry, they’ve seen a huge explosion of people flood to cannabis in the hopes of growing generational wealth in the once in a lifetime Green Rush. But not all has lived up to everyone’s expectations. And as we found out today, AI has something to say about it.
Dutchman Jair Velleman, a long time entrepreneur in the cannabis industry and founder brands such as Gavita the lighting company, Home Grown Expo and Garden Culture Magazine, posted the response to his Facebook page on April 10th 2025.
The response was something you would expect to see on stage at a cannabis comedy night or the entertainment at a cannabis industry awards show.
“When I asked Chat GPT to roast the Cannabis industry.
The legal cannabis industry is the only place where you can lose millions selling a product people have been begging to buy for decades. How do you screw up selling weed? That’s like opening a taco stand during a munchies convention and still going bankrupt.
These companies said, “We’re bringing cannabis into the mainstream!” — and then proceeded to gentrify it so hard it now comes in child-proof packaging that even adults can’t open. Half the products look like they were designed by a tech startup, named by an AI, and priced like Gucci cologne. $80 eighths that taste like hay with a QR code? Get outta here.
And don’t get me started on corporate growers. These guys got million-dollar facilities with air purification, led lights, and irrigation systems — and still manage to grow flower that smells like cardboard and hits like regret. Meanwhile, some dude in Humboldt growing under the moonlight with a joint in his mouth is putting out gas that’ll send you to Mars.
Also: “compliance” is now the buzzword. Not quality. Not community. Just compliance. Congratulations, you passed 15 lab tests — and still grew mid. Yay.
And of course, let’s not forget the diversity panels at cannabis conferences. A whole room full of rich white dudes in Patagonia vests saying, “We’re really trying to be inclusive.” Meanwhile the people who went to jail for this plant can’t even get a damn license.
And finally, the cherry on top: taxes. Legal weed is so overtaxed in some states, the illicit market is thriving harder than ever. You created a legal system where the plug is still king. Iconic.
Responses to the post agreed “that was really on the nose” and “Accurate. Except the last time I decided to try dispensary weed, it tasted like mildew, not hay. Otherwise spot on.”
It’s a kind of vindication that the legacy market needs after years of being told we just need to wait for the money men to iron out the kinks…that we ironed out 20+ years ago!
Corporate conglomerate cannabis businesses have tried to crush smaller producers and in many cases they have succeeded, in the process hurting families that have relied on that income from cannabis for generations. But in doing so, they have replaced a quality and diversified market with a smaller choice and lower standard. People who never had an interest in cannabis before it was legal, and they thought they could cash in on it. Well, the market knows – and so does AI!
What’s the UKCSC’s take?
Legalisation policies should be designed to integrate the existing market in a process of transitioning. Instead, the over gentrification of the cannabis market has sucked the life and quality out of the experience and the culture.
We know this gentrification was intentional. In 2015 Tory run think tanks were running “cannabis rebranding” workshops in London saying “we need to give cannabis a face lift”. These are the people that are selling advertising services to clinics now, who incidentally are struggling to fulfil the numbers they projected to their shareholders in 2018. Why? Well, just look at what AI has to say about the people they are doing business with.
To be clear, the medical cannabis products that are being prescribed and sold in the UK are what is being spoken of. Think of the cannabis social clubs as the dudes in Humboldt growing under the moon!
Want to see a legal cannabis market in the UK that includes cannabis social clubs and gives you the right to grow at home? Become a supporter member today and get involved with the community, find your local club or if there isn’t one, we can help you start one.
